Title: Condition Of My Heart
Fandom: Super Junior
Pairings: Kyuhyun/Sungmin mainly
Summary: Kyuhyun realises that he likes Sungmin. What does he do about it? Deny it of course.
A/N: Spot for leia_in_pajamas
because she suggested the idea of more angry!chul <3
Previous Chapters: Prologue
'Oh hyung I found my nunchucks you can...' Sungmin looked up and his sentence trailed off. 'You're not Hankyung-hyung.'
'Obviously.' Kyuhyun snorted, but backed away with hands raised as Sungmin's arms fisted around the nunhucks. 'Heechul wanted me to get my console so I could play with him but I'll just leave. Like right now. Before there's any pain. Involving me.' Kyuhyun backed away slowly from Sungmin, like a person trying to escape from a wild animal, before his back slammed hard into the closed door. Reaching behind him slowly for the doorknob, he cursed and slammed his palm resoundingly on the wooden frame when the door refused to budge.
'You idiots! What do you think you guys are doing!'
'We lost the key!' Hankyung called from just outside the door. 'We were testing the locks to make sure that everything was safe.'
'Everything is safe you asshole. What are you worried about? Rape?!'
'We're not going to let you guys out until you become friends again.' Donghae piped up from where he was taking refuge behind Eunhyuk's back. Not that he was much help. Eunhyuk was trying to sneak behind Shindong, who rolled his eyes and stepped away to go eat ice cream.
'You gotta be shitting me.' Kyuhyun shouted furiously.
Sungmin got up and tested the corners of the doorframe, 'You know, I think I can break this.'
A chorus of protests sounded from outside as Ryeowook bemoaned his terrible fate for the next few days.
'If you guys break the door, there's Heechul, Kangin, Siwon and Hankyung outside to keep you guys at bay anyway!' Eeteuk nudged a grumbling Kangin forward as he tried to stop his voice from squeaking. Siwon twisted his hands nervously. Heechul looked smug. 'I'll strangle you with more pink feather boas Cho Kyuhyun!'
'Sungmin hyung can take you guys one-handed!'
'No I can't you idiot! There's four of them and one of me! Go back to kindergarten and count!'
'Aren't you supposed to be some king of wushee or something?'
'It's wushu! And it shows how much you know about me Cho Kyuhyun!'
'Oh boy.' Yesung pulled Ryeowook further away from the door. 'Here we go.' Everybody ran for their rooms without another word.
Sungmin picked up a book and flung it at Kyuhyun's head as Kyuhyun dropped to the floor in a panic. He let out a yell as Sungmin picked up another book, thicker than the previous one by three times at least. He feinted left and right, like a goalie in front of the door with his hands raised defensively. 'Min listen to me! I know I was wrong but - '
'No I won't! I'm through listening to you Kyuhyun! It's always Starcraft this or Starcraft that, or bring me some food will you Min, I'm on a killing campaign. I'm done! I'm done being nice to you Kyuhyun!' Sungmin screamed as he heaved a small vase towards the door, the glass shattering over Kyuhyun as he held a pillow warily over his head. The elder grabbed his prized nunchucks and used them to fling the books one by one at the cowering figure by the bed. Now Kyuhyun remembered why he never wanted to make Sungmin mad. It was like the apocalypse.
'Oh my god! Stay away from my computer!'
Kyuhyun grabbed a small pillow and threw it blindly at Sungmin. With a muffled thump and an outraged gasp, he knew he had struck something or someone. Without pausing to look, he grabbed somemore pillows and threw them before his target had a chance to retaliate. But then, his computer mouse struck him square on the forehead. Momentarily stunned and apalled, Kyuhyun opened his mouth to yell before he choked and started to dry heave violently, sinking heavily to his knees.
'Yah! Cho Kyuhyun if you puke on my bed I'm going to kill you.'
'Min it hurts.' Kyuhyun clutched at his stomach, doubling over in pain. 'Make it stop. Min!'
'If you're faking to try and get me to soften up, I will hit you so hard that - '
But Sungmin never got to finish his sentence, because Kyuhyun threw up blood onto the floor.
Sungmin's eyes went wide. 'Oh my god. Kyu! Help! Help somebody please! Kyu stay with me!'
And he ran to Kyuhyun's motionless form on the ground and hugged him, repeating his name over and over again before the members burst through the door.
'It was a perforated stomach ulcer, brought on by stress and his irregular eating habits this past week or so. It ruptured and Kyuhyun had to go for emergency surgery.' Sungmin repeated the doctor's words emotionlessly to the anxioius members waiting in the dorm. Their manager had to forcibly prevent them from flocking to the hospital to avoid front page headlines, which resulted in alot of shouting and colourful curses before their manager threatened to not let them see Kyuhyun until he was discharged. 'Eeteuk hyung is staying in the hospital with him. They had to put him out from the pain and he's still in surgery but hyung made me come home.'
He took off his shoes mechanically and locked himself in his room, ignoring the repeated calls of his name.
'But, but, the blood all over the floor?' Eunhyuk stammered out as his eyes swivelled from member to member.
'I used a lot of bleach. Wasn't easy but it's mostly gone. Siwon helped me pick up the glass and stuff.' Ryeowook nodded against Yesung's shoulder worriedly.
Donghae buried his head further into Heechul's lap where the elder had been consoling his favourite dongsaeng. 'This is all my fault.'
'Hush. It's not your fault. He already had the stomach ulcer, it was only a matter of time or so.' Ryeowook leaned over to rub his back gently. Closer and closer the members gathered together, soothing each other's hurt and drawing comfort from the people around them, Kangin's arm around Shindong's shoulders, Hankyung keeping an arm around Siwon's waist and Yesung supporting Eunhyuk's sagging head, Super Junior gathered to keep a vigil for one of their own in hospital. Sungmin stretched out on Kyuhyun's bed, breathed in the scent of his hair, and finally allowed himself to cry.
'Why does Sungmin hyung never visit?'
Shindong and Siwon exchanged uncertain looks. 'We don't really see him at the dorms lately, except when he comes home to sleep. We're not exactly sure where he goes.' Siwon continued spooning chicken soup into Kyuhyun's mouth. 'Eat. You need to keep your strength up.'
'I'm not hungry.' Kyuhyun turned his head away.
'You have to eat, the doctor says regular meals are of utmost importance right now. Before you get another ulcer or something.' Shindong argued weakly, never one to be confrontational. Siwon had no such qualms, his face grew dark and he shoved the spoon into Kyuhyun's face. 'Eat, or I'll shove it down your throat.' The maknae gulped and opened his mouth. Siwon wasn't afraid to use his muscles for the greater good.
The severity of his ulcer meant that they had to keep him under observation to make sure that there weren't any more in his stomach. The days passed and the visitors in and out of his room tired Kyuhyun. Everybody blurred together and he found himself imagining that he saw Sungmin in every crowd that passed his room. He looked up eagerly every time his room door opened, only to be let down again when it wasn't a familiar dark haired figure. On a happier side note, Kyuhyun personally loved waking up every morning to a fresh sprig of eucalyptus by his bed. He knew it meant protection and he was glad that someone out there was trying to protect him in their own way. The doctors reluctantly allowed him out of his ward to walk and exercise and he kept a hand over his stitches constantly, wincing everytime he stretched a little too far past his limits. Kyuhyun loved the large garden, where he could lose himself in the greenery and not worry about fans or performing. He breathed in the fresh air deeply, allowing it to fill his lungs. Kyuhyun let his eyes roam the garden and his gaze fell on a pink flower and his heart sank.
He needed to see Sungmin. He needed to see him and tell him that he was sorry for being blind to Sungmin's previous (his heart ached at that thought) feelings for him, to shake him and tell him don't look at Sunny, look at me instead.
But it was probably never going to be. He had a chance and he blew it.
The only question now was how he was going to happy again when his heart was overflowing with tears.
A/N: I'm sorry for making people cry and breaking hearts the last chapter and I have a feeling I'm going to get bricked for this one too *cowers* The ending is kinda the filler between the beginning of this chapter and the next haha, I had it all figured out but it got too choppy so I had to put something in. Just one more chapter and an epilogue to go!Formspring
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Does anybody want to ask me random questions? My Formspring is kinda quiet haha. Requests are being worked out in between the chapters of the fic.